This NOWvember is dedicated to my Superman...

If you follow my blog you'll know that I have coined the month of November "NOWvember". As in NO EXCUSES and DO IT NOW!

I have been struggling with some vicious panic attacks and non stop bouts of crying. Feeling so tremendously alone and sad. It's coming up on that time of year that I lost my best friend and Superman. My daddy.

I can't believe it's almost been 8 years because sometimes, like now, it feels like I just lost him yesterday. And the heartache I feel this year only rivals in intensity with the heartache I felt when I first lost him. It's insane. What I wouldn't give to hug him again. To hear one of his countless (and endless) stories or just hear him tell me that he loves me.

So I'm redirecting my focus. As hard as this is, as much as I'm hurting, this WILL NOT BREAK ME. I'm using this heartache to fuel me. This month, that I have coined as NOWvember, is dedicated not only to myself but to my daddy. I WILL lose this weight and I will do this for him. 

Because he couldn't and I still can.

This month is for you, my Superman. 

I love you daddy, For forever and a day, 

To the moon and back, you light my way.