I've heard that crazy dreams are par for the course on the Whole30, but maaaan I really had the craziest dream last night!
I was competitive swimming through a swamp. I wanted the gold medal but every foot forward I swam, an alligator was trying to attack me. I had to constantly fight him off. Yes, it was a him. I know this because he told me his name was Stan. No joke. Wth, right? Lol I had almost gotten to the end of the race and I heard a scream. I turned and saw the alligator behind me with my daughter in his mouth. I turned back, pulled her from his mouth, set her on a beach chair on top of the water, and then began an epic battle with him. As I'm about to deliver the final blow, suddenly I'm in a meeting with Johnny Depp. Who by the way is the President. Say whaaaat? He tells me that the world is under attack by zombie alligator men and that the fate of the world depends on me. To save the world, I have to eat an entire "death by chocolate" molten lava cake. By myself. The cake was the size of a family size pizza. I dutifully sat down and began eating the cake. After all, the world was counting on me. Every single bite I took, I sobbed because I knew the cake was not Whole30 compliant. And then I woke up. Crazy, right?!?
I was competitive swimming through a swamp. I wanted the gold medal but every foot forward I swam, an alligator was trying to attack me. I had to constantly fight him off. Yes, it was a him. I know this because he told me his name was Stan. No joke. Wth, right? Lol I had almost gotten to the end of the race and I heard a scream. I turned and saw the alligator behind me with my daughter in his mouth. I turned back, pulled her from his mouth, set her on a beach chair on top of the water, and then began an epic battle with him. As I'm about to deliver the final blow, suddenly I'm in a meeting with Johnny Depp. Who by the way is the President. Say whaaaat? He tells me that the world is under attack by zombie alligator men and that the fate of the world depends on me. To save the world, I have to eat an entire "death by chocolate" molten lava cake. By myself. The cake was the size of a family size pizza. I dutifully sat down and began eating the cake. After all, the world was counting on me. Every single bite I took, I sobbed because I knew the cake was not Whole30 compliant. And then I woke up. Crazy, right?!?
I woke up feeling pretty good, but tired because I went to bed late. I made a yummy breakfast, cleaned up a bit, and then threw 2 beautiful pot roasts into my slow cooker. Went about my day as usual. Around 4:00 pm I walked into the kitchen and glanced at my 5 month old slow cooker only to see that the lid, still intact, had somehow shattered into a thousand pieces. There were a few tiny pieces of glass missing too, which meant that my roasts and veggies now contained glass. Noooooooo!!! I had no back up plan for a quick dinner. I cried. What's a girl to do?!? I knew fast food was out of the question so I placed a carry out order with a local steakhouse. My wallet hurt after that, but luckily we had the extra money and I was able to stay on track food wise. I came home and took everyone's meals out of their containers and put them on plates and we at the table and ate our rather expensive but compliant meal.
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