And so the first one leaves the nest...

I've had 18 years to prepare myself for this moment.. 18 long years. And then I blinked and here we are.. and I'm still not prepared.

My mind knows that this is a good thing.
My mind knows that it's not goodbye and that I'll see him soon. But my heart? Ohhhh my heart just won't listen to logic. My heart is breaking into a trillion pieces right now. Thinking about not yelling at him to clean his room.. not hearing him and his friends downstairs working out. Hearing them screaming at each each other to get pumped up for a heavy lift. Not having surprise extra mouths to feed at dinner time. I'm going to miss our late night 2 hour long talks because neither one of us can sleep.. Hearing his jokes and impressions.. Watching him wrestle with his little sister... Hearing his laugh and seeing his smile every day...

But I'm filled with so much pride. My first kiddo, my baby boy, is going off on his own.. out into this big scary world. To college, which neither his daddy nor I ever did.

I only hope and pray that I taught him well enough. That he feels confident enough to tackle anything and everything that this world throws his way. Yet also just unsure enough to be careful and thoughtful while doing so. I hope that he has many amazing life experiences and creates wonderful memories. That he will be a good friend and ally to many. That he will always remember who he is and that he remains true to himself always, even in the toughest situations..

Thankfully this isn't goodbye... but I'll see you soon.. and I can't wait to hear about this new chapter of his life, as I embark on this new chapter of mine, as well. I love you kiddo, for forever and a day, to the moon and back, you light my way.