Tuesday, January 25, 2011

My Personal Sanity... Or Something Like That.

If you know me- then you know where i can often be found at 3 am... In my kitchen baking something. It doesnt really matter what, just as long as I'm baking or cooking something. I can't quite understand it, myself, but that is where i feel the happiest. The most centered. The most whole, if you will. (whole.... hmmm... HOLE. I freaking LOVE that band...) It truly IS my personal sanity.. Anyhoo... I honestly cannot think of anything that i like to do that gives me the satisfaction that baking does. There is just something about taking individual ingredients and putting them together that makes me giddy. NO seriously- I often dance to music like a TOTAL jag bag while i cook and or bake. When someone tastes something ive made from scratch- just me and my 2 lil hands- and they like it (or better yet LOVE it) it makes me feel like I'm worth a damn. And while that may make me sound awfully pathetic- it is the truth... Maybe it is my low self esteem, or poor view of myself, idk... All i know is that when everything is going wrong and it feels like i just cant do a single damn thing right,  i can bake something. And hearing "yum", or "OMG" or "OH MOMMY THESE ARE EVEN GOODER THAN AWESOME!" (to quote my little Lucy-bell) just brightens me up and makes my fucking day! Hey- it is what it is, and i'm certainly not complaining. :)
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